Self Control

Overall, I would say I exhibit a pretty good measure of self-control in my life, and I think people who know me would say the same. I don't usually let my emotions get the best of me, I can hold my tongue (usually), I can wait for something I want to go on sale, I understand and chose to live in a way that I feel glorifies to Lord, even if it means on missing out on something in the here and now. BUT one area where I exhibit significantly less self-control is when I crave something specific to eat. And mind you, these cravings can be absurd and strange combinations (corn on the cob and donut holes; milkshakes and burritos for example). I don't mean it in a gluttonous way, or as in I just eat whatever (if that was the case my butt would be on The Biggest Loser), but it's like once I get my mind set on something specific, nothing else just quite satisfies.

It's this very craving-driven determiniation that binds my friend Katie and I together. I can always count on her not only sympathizing with but partaking in the strange quests for whatever we happen to be craving at the time. Perhaps one of our first bonding moments was sometime, I guess freshman year, when I came into her room proclaiming "OMG I need a cheeseburger!!" and we immediately had to go to Jack in the Box :)

I tell that story for two reasons.

One, I got it in my head last night that I really wanted chili cheese fries and thus I made a trip to the grocery store after work (and working out) to get all the ingredients, and I thus enjoyed a wonderful dinner.

Second, I have to laugh at myself for the reality of how single-mindedly focused I can be sometimes on such silly (and maybe some not so silly) things, not just random cravings, but a lot of other little fixations in my life. If I would just take half the time I spend planning for or thinking about those things and direct that craving and driveness towards pursuing Christ, imagine the doors He could open and the things He could do through me. Jesus is better than a burrito flavored cheeseburger with a side of donut holes and a milkshake to drink, and He deserves Lordship over my entire life as silly and ridiculous as I may be.

Something JD said in his sermon yesterday was, "If Jesus is not Lord of all of your life, then He's not Lord at all." Heavy. Perhaps I went around my elbow to get to my butt to get to this point, but why is it that I am so willing to submit my will in some areas and so unwilling in others?

Ahh, the things the Lord can reveal through chili fries :)

Day Seven:

1. BIG hugs from little children I haven't seen in twelve weeks :)
2. That my mom loves to send things in the mail
3. When rainy mornings end up in beautiful afternoons
4. That I get to share in the excitement and joy of the upcoming weddings of some of my dear friends
5. That the Lord likes to give me "projects" when I'm trying to fall asleep