"This Is Real, This is Me"

Sometimes I think about the things that I do or the things that I like, and I just have to laugh, because in so many ways I just haven't really changed a lot over the years. Thankfully, some things have changed since I was a kid, I no longer wear overalls or sequined jeans as actual clothing, for example; but, the inspiration for this list comes from the things that I just think will always be true about me. Here it goes:

1. I will always be the impulse candy buyer in the check out line. I love candy, and my love goes back as far as I can remember. I have fond memories of getting a dollar from my mom or dad, marching down to the teacher's lounge and getting M&M's and a Sprite (always) and that was way back in like 2nd grade. Do you remember when a dollar got you both a snack and a drink? Gah, those were the days.

2. I will always love reality television. I mean, I was watching Bug Juice and The Real World, way back in the day when MTV still played music videos and the Disney Channel had those crazy Zoog things. I think this fascination with reality television explains a lot about why I loved psychology so much. People fascinate me, I love to study them in both a formal and informal sense and reality television puts some of the world's finest on display for my analytical pleasure.

3. I will always love paper products. I have a very vivid memory of being in a Toys-R-Us as a child, with money to spend, and wanting to buy a composition book. Why? I don't really know. I liked toys, but that is what I wanted. This love is now demonstrated with the stack of unused journals sitting on my bookshelf and the crate full of stationary and cards sitting on the floor in my room.

4. There will always be a part of me that wants to be a rock star. Now, the Lord did not really bless me with the gifts or talents neccesary to make it in the entertainment industry, but boy do I wish He did. To be honest, I kind of hate being the center of attention, but there is a part of me that craves it and always thought it would so cool to be famous. Jordan says all of us Currie kids want to be performers it just comes out in different ways. For my brothers, I would say it was with music, and I think camp allowed me to be my own version of a rock star.

5. I will always love writing. In 3rd grade I decided I was going to write a book called Christy's Big Adventure. I don't really know who Christy was, but she had a lot of magical friends, and to me, that was literary gold. I never finished it (although I do think I still have it in my room at home somewhere), but the desire and motivation to write ever went away. I have kept a journal consistently since I was 8 years old. I love to blog. I loved writing papers in school. And my freshman year of college I had the inspiration for another book that I do believe I will write someday. I just love the written word and have always preferred it to the spoken word. I love the idea of something being written down, and thus saved to keep.

6. I will always be indecisive and over analytical. This is probably one of my most annoying traits that has plagued me forever. It doesn't have to be a big decision, I am indecisive about just about everything: where to eat, what time to wake up, whether or not I should buy something in the store or wait, where I should live, whether I really want to get up and go the bathroom now or just wait until later.

7. I will always love musicals. This, I blame on Disney. Just about every Disney movie is a musical and I watched a lot of Disney growing up. I remember watching Newsies, Grease, and Little Shop of Horrors when I think we still lived in West Virginia. I remember my mom taking me to go see a stage production of Grease. We always had a lot of music growing up, whether it was the Beatles, Billy Joel, Cat Stevens or Wee Sing Silly Songs, it was there, and I am very thankful for that.

8. I will always suck at verbalizing and expressing emotions. I really don't know exactly why this has always been a challenge for me. I feel like I've always been pretty willing to express an opinion or get in front of a group to talk on a sort of superficial level, but I have always been uncomfortable with really being honest about how I really feel about things and people. I do think I have gotten better, and this is one thing that I sort of hope will change, but as for now, it's been consistent.

9. I will always love being outside in the sunshine. I don't consider myself the most outdoorsy person by any means, but I have always loved being outside. As some know, I used to pack up my backpack and head out to the undeveloped lot behind my house and read in the woods as a kid. In high school I would sit at the picnic table outside the classroom back door just to get sunshine. Even now I can't quite express the true depth of the happiness I feel when spring makes a comeback after winter. God is very present in nature for me and so many of my fondest memories are tied to camp, which was outdoors :)

10. I will always be excited about the simple things in life. I remember one time in high school being told I was simple and being very hurt and upset about it, but over the years I have learned that it really isn't a bad thing at all. While there is a part of me that very much loves to indulge in some of the finer and unnecessary things in life (The Melting Pot, shoes, jewelry, Ritter Sport chocolate, etc), I do think I am pretty simple in what really makes me happy---ice cream, watching terrible movies, sitting outside with friends, brightly colored nail polish, spontaneous dance parties with people I love. I'm ok with that.

I also think I will always be terrible about getting myself to bed at a reasonable hour :)