Restless

rest-less [rest-lis] adj.

1. characterized by or showing inability to remain at rest
2. unquiet or uneasy as a person, the mind, or the heart
3. not content

what i'm getting at is that i need a swift kick in the pants. i just can't seem to get my butt in gear. i still enjoy school and i want to do my work, but i am just lacking motivation. i want to get up early and get ready, but i keep hitting the snooze. i want to make my days productive, but then i have days like today, where (no exaggeration) i keep my butt planted in front of the tv for hours aimlessly flipping through channels. About the most productive thing i did today was actually watch a movie to its completion. i surpassed unproductive.

i'm not really sure what my deal is.

lately i have just been feeling sort of discontent. perhaps i am subconsciously stressed out about all the stuff I have going on at school, but i really don't think that's it. i'm not particularly worried about what to do after graduation (although I do need a backup in case The Real World doesn't work out), but I have to admit I'd like a little more clarity in that area.

i think i'm just ready for something different...something new...something exciting...an adventure.

i'm not unhappy, but i think i keep trying to convince myself i'd be happier if only (fill in the blank with various plans and desires here). it's not good, i know the Lord needs to be my total fulfillment, but I'm having a hard time grasping that at the moment.