Yesterday was October 29th--and while it may seem just like any other day to most of you, to those of us who had the difficult pleasure of being in Susie Huggins' AP class at the Academy will always remember this day.
On October 29th, 2002 while practicing for the AP Exam, which involved going through questions and writing our answers on a white board and comparing them with other people in the class, I seemed to run into the continuous problem of doubting my own ability to answer correctly and end up changing my answer based on someone else. Well after repetedly doing this and several times realizing my original answer was correct (You must keep in mind that at this stage in my life I was dealing with a "simplicity" complex ::wink::) Mrs. Huggins decided it was time to declare a holiday.
She said to us, as Andy valiantly jumped up to write "Oct 29" on the board, "Let this be the day that you learn not to let yourself be swayed and influenced by those around you."
To those of you who had the pleasure of enjoying that moment and who are actually reading this, which would probably only be you Natasha, but that day had nothing to do with the AP exam and almost everything to do with life.
Sunday, October 31, 2004
Saturday, October 30, 2004
Join Me in a Sigh of Relief
This past week has been one of the most mentally exhausting weeks I have had in a L-O-N-G time. Three tests, advising and planning for next semester, and a paper due.
Needless to say, I am quite relieved that this week is over.
It just seemed like I had a million things to do, each requiring more time than I had avaliable. Hours and hours of studying, reading, writing, reviewing. It is a rather unpleasant existance to be THAT focused on one particular area. Luckily, I realize there is much more to life than school. It is also fortunate that I am a Type B personality. Not only do I not have to worry about being an overachiever, I am also at less risk for heart problems. Go me!
Needless to say, I am quite relieved that this week is over.
It just seemed like I had a million things to do, each requiring more time than I had avaliable. Hours and hours of studying, reading, writing, reviewing. It is a rather unpleasant existance to be THAT focused on one particular area. Luckily, I realize there is much more to life than school. It is also fortunate that I am a Type B personality. Not only do I not have to worry about being an overachiever, I am also at less risk for heart problems. Go me!
Thursday, October 28, 2004
Gray Skies
If the world were to one day decide to die, I imagine it would look much like it does outside right now.
It has been an absolutely wretched week in Rock Hill. The sun has yet to reveal itself once. All we have seen is gray skies and the constant threat of a misting rain. It's rather depressing. I wish it would just pour and get it over with so we can get a move on with blue skies and sunshine.
Sometimes I wonder if people who don't know Jesus live in this constant state of gray. That is such a terrible existence. It reminds me a lot of the gray city in C.S. Lewis's The Great Divorce.
There is nothing appealing about gray.
But seriously, even though it may be absolutely hideous outside, a lot of times, after the initial complaining about the weather, I find myself pleasantly distracted by my company, the squirrels, the trees or something else. It's like, regardless of the weather, I can still find things to be happy about.
People who don't know God's love though, they are just stuck in this ugly mindset. It's really quite sad.
It has been an absolutely wretched week in Rock Hill. The sun has yet to reveal itself once. All we have seen is gray skies and the constant threat of a misting rain. It's rather depressing. I wish it would just pour and get it over with so we can get a move on with blue skies and sunshine.
Sometimes I wonder if people who don't know Jesus live in this constant state of gray. That is such a terrible existence. It reminds me a lot of the gray city in C.S. Lewis's The Great Divorce.
There is nothing appealing about gray.
But seriously, even though it may be absolutely hideous outside, a lot of times, after the initial complaining about the weather, I find myself pleasantly distracted by my company, the squirrels, the trees or something else. It's like, regardless of the weather, I can still find things to be happy about.
People who don't know God's love though, they are just stuck in this ugly mindset. It's really quite sad.
Purity As a Lifestyle
Over the past several months I have had this fascination with the concept of purity. Not just physical purity, as in, not having sex before you are married, but purity in its entirety--purity as a lifestyle.
I suppose this interest spawned after seeing Jason Evert and Matt Smith give a chastity talk at NCYC last November. However, I believe it was after hearing Jason speak a second time this past March at High School Conference that I began to feel very convicted my the message of purity. I really admire Jason for his wisdom and encouragement of purity. Not only does he attack the issue from a moral and religious standpoint but he backs up his arguments with medical and psychological findings. It's really amazing.
Over these past few months, however, I have reached the general consesus that God really does not intend for us to date. If he did there would not be the emotional implications that go along with the entire "dating scene." Emotional wounds like that are just not what God intended. When you really consider it from all angels we are really and truly only designed for "One Love," to quote U2.
However, back to living purity.
This semester I have been attending a bible study here on campus and together we are reading a book called When God Writes Your Love Story by Eric and Leslie Ludy. I highly recommend that everyone glance over this book a time or two. However, the chapter that we discussed this week really got my mind going because Leslie addresses the fact that "physical purity cannot be serparated from our emotions" and to elaborate on that our emotions are a reflections of our thoughts, views, and motives, therefore in order to really live a pure life, to achieve purity in all its glory we must be constantly seeking God with every second of our life and we must be constantly chasing after his will. Leslie later goes on to make this statement which I found most provocative:
"It doesn't mean we will always be perfect, but it does mean that we will be headed in the right direction...on a path not of compromise, but of radiant and joyful purity in its truest forms."
God has so many incredible blessings He is just dying to bestow upon us but through our own actions and giving in to our own will and desires we deny ourself pure and radiant joy. It boggles my mind really.
What I particularly liked about this particular quote though, it her comment about heading in the right direction. Again that goes back to what I said earlier about seeking God.
We are not perfect (Ben Moser, this unfortunately includes you, although you come so very close), and in reality God never asks us to be perfect, he created us knowing well and good that we are going to screw up and constantly fall short of His glory. What He does ask us to do though, is to keep our focus on Him and try our darnedest to live out His word with our lives.
One of my biggest frustrations in this world is people who with their mouths will give glory and praise to God and then live a lifestyle that does not reflect that. What frustrates me even more is when people feel convicted of what needs to change in their lives yet they do not even make a true, heartfelt effort to change. At least try, come on people.
Surrending our lives to God is one heck of a task, it may leave us confused, unsure, and vulnerable, but it sure does NOT make us weak. God really does have an amazing power to work through us and change lives but His light cannot shine brightly through a tarnished heart.
Create in me a clean heart, oh God, and renew a right spirit within me.
I suppose this interest spawned after seeing Jason Evert and Matt Smith give a chastity talk at NCYC last November. However, I believe it was after hearing Jason speak a second time this past March at High School Conference that I began to feel very convicted my the message of purity. I really admire Jason for his wisdom and encouragement of purity. Not only does he attack the issue from a moral and religious standpoint but he backs up his arguments with medical and psychological findings. It's really amazing.
Over these past few months, however, I have reached the general consesus that God really does not intend for us to date. If he did there would not be the emotional implications that go along with the entire "dating scene." Emotional wounds like that are just not what God intended. When you really consider it from all angels we are really and truly only designed for "One Love," to quote U2.
However, back to living purity.
This semester I have been attending a bible study here on campus and together we are reading a book called When God Writes Your Love Story by Eric and Leslie Ludy. I highly recommend that everyone glance over this book a time or two. However, the chapter that we discussed this week really got my mind going because Leslie addresses the fact that "physical purity cannot be serparated from our emotions" and to elaborate on that our emotions are a reflections of our thoughts, views, and motives, therefore in order to really live a pure life, to achieve purity in all its glory we must be constantly seeking God with every second of our life and we must be constantly chasing after his will. Leslie later goes on to make this statement which I found most provocative:
"It doesn't mean we will always be perfect, but it does mean that we will be headed in the right direction...on a path not of compromise, but of radiant and joyful purity in its truest forms."
God has so many incredible blessings He is just dying to bestow upon us but through our own actions and giving in to our own will and desires we deny ourself pure and radiant joy. It boggles my mind really.
What I particularly liked about this particular quote though, it her comment about heading in the right direction. Again that goes back to what I said earlier about seeking God.
We are not perfect (Ben Moser, this unfortunately includes you, although you come so very close), and in reality God never asks us to be perfect, he created us knowing well and good that we are going to screw up and constantly fall short of His glory. What He does ask us to do though, is to keep our focus on Him and try our darnedest to live out His word with our lives.
One of my biggest frustrations in this world is people who with their mouths will give glory and praise to God and then live a lifestyle that does not reflect that. What frustrates me even more is when people feel convicted of what needs to change in their lives yet they do not even make a true, heartfelt effort to change. At least try, come on people.
Surrending our lives to God is one heck of a task, it may leave us confused, unsure, and vulnerable, but it sure does NOT make us weak. God really does have an amazing power to work through us and change lives but His light cannot shine brightly through a tarnished heart.
Create in me a clean heart, oh God, and renew a right spirit within me.
Sellout
So I found an online radio station that plays "Bit Hits of the 1990's" which makes me all kinds of happy. They played a Jewel song the other day, and it made me sad. She sold out.
Tuesday, October 26, 2004
Monday, October 25, 2004
I Have Become "That Kid"
If you know me, there is a good chance that at some point in our relationship I have severely warned you against the horrors of being "that kid." The term really applies to just about any situation and is quite enjoyable because when the term is used, we all can muster up some memory of a similar instance in which "that kid" really does exist.
At the same time, those who know me probably have observed that I myself have been "that kid" more than I let most people privy to, or at least I like to think.
This rambling has been prompted by the fact that I have indeed become "that kid" in partaking in the phenomenon that is online journaling. All I wanted to do was post, to post you must join, and to join you get sucked in.
At the same time, those who know me probably have observed that I myself have been "that kid" more than I let most people privy to, or at least I like to think.
This rambling has been prompted by the fact that I have indeed become "that kid" in partaking in the phenomenon that is online journaling. All I wanted to do was post, to post you must join, and to join you get sucked in.
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